PTSD – Page 3 – Nancy Jean Walker

Tag: PTSD

Post #65 – PTSD – Triggers Topple Like Dominoes – So I Created a Trigger Log to Recapture My Joy

By Nancy on January 20, 2016 • ( 2 Comments )

It baffles me how quickly joy can turn into sorrow, but once again, I find myself drowning in a pit of despair because of one well-intentioned but misspoken word, at least to me, when actually it was simply an innocent remark. Trigger: hypersensitivity to certain words toss me into […]

Post #61 – Why – A Poem – Living with PTSD

By Nancy on January 11, 2016 • ( Leave a comment )

She woke up and she wondered why Nothing much has changed since yesterday The pain is just as painful. Her body still shattered. So she wonders why. She dreams of a beautiful place and her entrance through a Heavenly doorway. But she woke up and realized she’s still here. So […]

Post #53 – I Didn’t Know How to Talk about It – Memoir

By Nancy on December 27, 2015 • ( 2 Comments )

Chapter 44 Descending When I was a kid, sun showers captivated me. I splashed in puddles and danced in the soft drizzle. Popsicle sticks floating in streams of water along a gutter enchanted me. Simple times. I was happy. During my teen years, I took long walks in […]

Post #44 – How Olympian POW Louis Zamperini Helped Me Forgive My Abusers

By Nancy on September 28, 2015 • ( Leave a comment )

Monday September 28, 2015 Photo from the movie Unbroken I watched the movie Unbroken last night. This riveting true story of horrific torture, undeterred inner strength, and true forgiveness left me weak and speechless. It caused me to think of all those who have abused, molested, raped, and […]

Post #41 – Why I Am So Passionate about the Plight of Human Trafficking – Being A Voice for the Voiceless

By Nancy on September 8, 2015 • ( Leave a comment )

Primarily, being a victim of sex traffickers, I experienced the evil firsthand at the hands of a gang of vicious pimps controlled by organized crime in New York City from the age of eighteen until I was twenty-one. Shane, the leader of the gang, kept me locked up […]

Post # 38 – Finding the Positive in the Midst of Confinement, PTSD, and Isolation

By Nancy on September 5, 2015 • ( 1 Comment )

Up until a few months ago, although mainly confined to bed, Getting up to cook, wash my hair or shop happened only on days that I have a doctor appointment – real luxuries for me. However, my medical situation has worsened quite a bit. Now, getting out of bed can […]

Post #37 – PTSD – A Step Towards Healing

By Nancy on September 4, 2015 • ( 2 Comments )

When I was fifty-eight, sixteen years after Tropical Spastic Paraparesis paralyzed my legs among causing other painful symptoms, and confined for the most part to bed, I became suicidal. I could not endure another waking hour of suffering or another hellish nightmare invading my sleep. Deeply depressed at […]

Post #31 – Life Threatening News, Self-Blame, Dreams, Hope

By Nancy on August 21, 2015 • ( 2 Comments )

Last Wednesday, August 12th, during a routine ultrasound, the technician discovered that my stomach has shifted to my left side under my rib cage and is retaining fluid, so after she called the ordering physician, he sent me to ER. The attending doctor admitted me to the hospital […]

Post #28 – Self-Harming – My Secret

By Nancy on August 16, 2015 • ( Leave a comment )

I hid this secret for years because I still suffer episodes of harming myself when I’m deeply hurt or severely depressed. It’s a coping mechanism that I sometimes cannot control. My emotional pain becomes so overwhelming that I slap myself as hard as I can several times across my face or […]

Post #27 – Feeling Antsy, Aching for Freedom

By Nancy on August 16, 2015 • ( Leave a comment )

Lying here trying to will my legs to move. Arguing with them is futile. They refuse to obey me. I’m Krazy-glued to my bed. It makes me antsy. I want to jump out of this bed. I wish to feel my foot on the gas pedal of a […]